The Choose Yourself Blueprint

How I went from 325 pounds and blackout drunk to sober, 100 pounds down, and a TEDx stage. And the exact shift that did it.

Read this first

Hey, rebel soul.

This is the whole story. Not the polished Instagram version. The real one, so you can see the exact moment everything turned, and find yours.

Because here is what nobody tells you: I did not lose the weight and then become confident. I became a woman who chose herself, and the body followed. That order is everything. And by the end of this, you are going to know how to start choosing yourself too.

Let's go.

Chapter One · The Bottom

The day I couldn't catch my own son.

I was well over 300 pounds, a toddler at home and pregnant with my daughter. It was wintertime. My son started running away from me, towards the road, and I panicked, because I could not move my body fast enough to catch him.

As I started chasing him, I slipped on the ice and I went down and I fell. It hurts to fall when you weigh that much. And I laid there helpless, screaming at my son because I was so afraid. When I finally got up, I thought: I never want to feel this way in my body ever again.

I couldn't look at myself in the mirror half the time. I didn't recognise the woman looking back. I just saw someone afraid of life, afraid of her fullest potential, waiting for an invitation that was never coming.

Chapter Two · The Choice

Sobriety first. Then the dance floor.

People assume I chose the weight first. I didn't. I chose sobriety, because it was brought on by debilitating anxiety and blackout nights I am not proud of. I got blackout drunk on my wedding day and fell on the dance floor, because that version of me thought she needed alcohol to dance at her own wedding.

Then one night, newly sober and still just under 300 pounds, my friend's parents invited me to see a live band. Everyone there was retired, and nobody cared what anyone thought of them. It was my first time dancing without alcohol. And I danced in ways I didn't even know I could. I felt so alive in my body.

I went back every Thursday night. I was no longer a mom, no longer a wife, no longer that self-sacrificing woman. I was me. I was Jeany, and I was out of the bottle.

Chapter Three · The Identity Shift

I stopped being the woman who needed the weight.

Those weekly dance nights became my non-negotiable self-care. And slowly, the confidence came naturally, because I was embodying a new identity. I was that girl who danced, and then that girl who danced sober.

I no longer felt like that woman who needed the weight to feel safe, the one who had to hide behind it. So I started to naturally make better choices. I stopped eating for emotional reasons. And for the first time, I started to love myself. The frequency had changed. I attract differently now.

Not everyone clapped for me. The people who benefited from the old, self-sacrificing me could not handle the new one. 'You've changed,' they said. And I learned that is the highest compliment there is. Yes. Yes, I have changed.

Chapter Four · The Body Follows

What this body can do now.

I fly up the stairs now. At 325 I had to hold the railing and I would stand at the bottom debating how badly I actually needed the thing up there. Today I did over an hour on the StairMaster, over 200 flights, and people came up to me and said I inspire them.

I put my four-year-old on my shoulders and dance with her for a whole concert set. I wear the sleeveless shirts I swore off for years. I catch my reflection now and look twice, because I am checking her out, thinking, who is that hot woman? I love her. And I built this body naturally, no surgery, no miracle.

And when I walk onto a big stage now, to MC or give a keynote, I don't think about who I used to be. I just think about how good it feels to be me. She was always in there. We just forced her to do the uncomfortable things enough times that she became who I am by default.

Chapter Five · Your First Move

How you actually start: change your frequency.

Here is the method, for the skeptic in you. Everything is energy. Your thoughts trigger an emotion, and that emotion sets your frequency. You attract what you are, not what you want. Like energy attracts like energy. So you change your whole reality by changing one thought, from a lower fear thought to a higher love thought.

And the daily practice is this: follow your highest excitement. Faced with any two options, pick the one that excites you most, right now, with no attachment to the outcome. That one choice, made over and over, is what shifts everything. When I chose dancing, I had no idea it would lead to losing 100 pounds and standing on a TEDx stage. I just chose what excited me.

That is the whole blueprint. Feel it, choose you, and follow the excitement.

Don't let it go cold

You are one honest choice away.

You do not need to wait for your next life, or the perfect Monday, or permission from anyone. That fire has always been in you. You just have to start giving her the reps.

If you want the exact place to start, tap the button below and put your name on the Fully Alive list. I will send you the next step.

Get in. We are done settling.

Jeany

(She is out of the bottle.)